Dive ‘Under The Covers’ with Yinn and friends in our series dedicated to exploring, honouring, and celebrating our intimate individualism. Together we discuss sexuality, self-love, culture, pleasure essentials, and so much more juicy goodness!

An interview with Sexuality and Relationship Coach Sarah Wilde, creatrix of Modern Sex Life and queen of conscious mindset and empowered living.

Q) Tell us a little bit about yourself and what you do. 

Hello there! I'm Sarah Wilde, and my pronouns are she/her. As the creatrix of Modern Sex Life, I'm deeply passionate about guiding individuals and couples towards fulfilling relationships. My journey towards self-liberation from societal norms has allowed me to embrace my identity as a woman in all its complexities. This personal exploration forms the foundation of my work as a sex and relationship coach, where I empower others to embark on their own journeys of personal growth and exploration. 

At the young age of 19, I married the love of my life, Brad. Through the years, we have experienced countless transformations, continuously choosing one another and evolving together. Our relationship fuels my empathy and understanding as I support my clients through their own relational challenges.

Q) Where can people find you? 



Q) What inspired you to start The Modern Sex Life?

The inspiration behind The Modern Sex Life stems from a personal journey within my own relationship with Brad. During one of the darkest periods, I found myself feeling a sense of emptiness, unsure of where to turn or who to seek guidance from. Brad and I faced this challenging season by turning towards each other, taking in as many resources as possible, and courageously engaging in the difficult conversations daily. It was through this process of personal growth and mutual support that we were empowered to create the relationship we both wanted. 

The vision for Modern Sex Life came from this experience, driven by a desire to become the source of inspiration and guidance for others, both in their darkest moments and their brightest. I'm passionate about providing couples with the tools, knowledge, and support they need to navigate the inevitable ebbs and flows of long-term relationships with empathy and awareness.

Q) What is your favourite part about your job and why?

I love empowering couples to establish their own relationship agreements and create the partnership they truly desire. Through the Modern Method, which has  four essential pillars—Emotional Intelligence, Conscious Communication, Sexual Fitness, and Personal Growth—I guide couples towards shedding old patterns and creating a deeply fulfilling relationship that aligns with their unique needs and desires.

Q) What was the main message about sex and sexuality that you received growing up?

Growing up, the main message about sex and sexuality that I received was rooted in purity culture. As a teenager, I was in an environment that essentially severed my connection to pleasure, desire, and my own sexual energy. It felt as though that integral part of my identity was tightly bound, inaccessible, and covered in shame. The pervasive narrative surrounding sex was one of fear largely in part to the lack of open conversation on the topic.

Q) How did you begin to explore and establish your own beliefs around this topic? 

A significant turning point for me occurred when I stopped using birth control. Suddenly, my sex drive skyrocketed, and we found ourselves on this exciting journey of exploration. We were curious about each other in ways we had not been before. From that moment onward, we started researching and exploring various modalities of sexuality together. We committed to identifying and releasing any lingering thoughts of shame or fear, replacing them with an attitude of curiosity and a willingness to embrace exploration. 

Q) If you had the chance, what would you tell your younger self about sex now? 

I would take younger Sarah by the hands and tell her ‘Know Thyself’. Learn the intricacies of your body, how your cycle works, what brings you pleasure. Trust what feels good and voice what does not, sexual expression is healthy and allowing yourself to seek pleasure and be seen in it is acceptable and beautiful.

Q) What do self-care and self-love look like for you?  

In this season of life the most essential part of self-care for me is sitting in silence and feeling into my body. Some days I use hapé to connect, other days I do breath work. I feel centered and recharged when I am able to still my thoughts and remind myself who I am and what I offer those around me. 

Q) What do you love about your body?

I really love how soft and smooth my skin is. I enjoy massaging oils into my body to keep it soft and glowing.  

Yinn recommends The Body Oil. 

Q) What are your top 3 pleasure essentials?

I am very sensual so I love to be surrounded by soft textures, sexy smells and vibey music. Once those essentials are met I really enjoy a blindfold to build anticiaption, a crystal pleasure wand, and lube. 

Q) Favourite song to get you in the mood? 

I love moving my body to Feel You by Yakamoto Kotzuga. There is nothing worse than being pulled out of the moment because the music is not right. Modern Sex Life has several playlists that will be releasing soon and I can’t wait to share! 

Check out Yinn's range of sensual playlists here.

Q) Do you have any particular people in your life who inspire you to be a sexually empowered person?

I have spent years cultivating a group of friends who encourage and celebrate my sexual empowerment. Over the last year especially I have been able to open up and share parts of me that I have compartmentalized. 

It's incredibly liberating to be in a space where I don't feel the need to hide any aspect of myself. Instead, I'm surrounded by individuals who encourage and inspire me to explore the boundaries of my sexuality and pleasure as we savor life together.

Enjoyed this article? Check out Sarah and Brad's piece His and Her Guide: Embracing Toys for Deeper Intimacy. 

April 26, 2024