As common as they are, dating apps often come with some baggage and stigma. But at the end of the day, they’re just another tool we can use to connect with all sorts of people – people we may not have otherwise run into out “in the wild”.
Still, it’s easy to get caught up in the swiping and screen time and lose sight of what you want, and who you really are. Like anything, dating apps can be amazing in moderation, and when used with the right approach.
If you want to use dating apps mindfully, you have to approach them with authenticity. How do you stay authentic in the whirlwind of dating apps? We’re here to help!
Do a Profile Audit.
First impressions matter. On dating apps – it’s all that you have. It’s a good idea to go through your profile every month or so and update it.
Does it reflect who you really are and how you want to be perceived? Do you feel confident in the pictures you posted? Did you put energy into your profile and any prompts you answered?
No matter what you want out of online dating, it all starts with your profile. The amount of energy you put into it sets the foundation for whatever relationships or dynamics you create moving forward.
Be Honest with Your Intentions.
One of the biggest ways that people compromise their authenticity on dating apps is by not being clear with their intentions. Oftentimes this comes from a place of fear. Fear of abandonment. Fear of connection and being seen.
Society doesn’t often leave space for us to be honest about what our intentions are and what we want, especially in our sexual and romantic relationships. But when you aren’t totally honest with someone (including yourself), there’s always going to be a point of missing connection. A place where you’re not aligned because you’re not honoring what your heart needs.
It’s scary to risk rejection by being honest, but the faster you can say no to something that won’t work, the more space you create for the right connections to come in.
Take a Break.
No matter how confident you feel in your profile, or honest you’re being with your intentions, dating apps can get overwhelming at times. That overwhelm can keep you from showing up fully as yourself.
When the apps start to feel draining or monotonous, it’s probably best to take a break. Give yourself time to focus on yourself and the people who are already in your life, and fill your cup back up.
That way when you’re ready to dive back in, you’ll be refreshed and that much clearer about who you are and what you want.